If you insult your father or mother, your light will be snuffed out in total darkness.
I use to be a fan of the TLC program, “Jon and Kate plus 8″…the kids were cute, and the couple seemed so nice, struggling to live a normal life with such a large family. They were shown going to church, and often made references to their Christian faith. It was just a sweet little show, and a great witness to their faith that God would always provide, just like the Bible says He will.
But sadly, the sweet little show, has turned sour. The nice struggling couple no longer exist. We now have a rich miserable couple, who don’t appreciate their cute kids; but instead cash in on them.
I don’t know what happened, but Kate is very rude and disrespectful to her husband, and to be honest pretty much every other man, (eg. the dog breeder, Steve Thomas, workmen at her house, her brother, the crew). She seems to loathe being with her kids, especially her boys, and displays a very dishonorable attitude towards her parents and Jon’s mother. In a recent episode, the children did not seem to know that they had a grandmother; they said their Dad was visiting “his Mom”.
This made me pause and think about the whole subject of “honoring” our parents. What does that mean, exactly? I don’t think many Americans know anymore. We see kids yelling at their parents in public. I have seen small children hit and kick their parents. An 8 year old in Arizona waited for his father with a gun, and killed him!
And older children, such as Kate Gosselin, do not seem to feel that they have a duty to the people who brought them into this world.
I know that Santhosh, the young man who has commented on this post; knows what it means to honor his parents. But is that because he comes from a different culture? And what has happened to our culture, that we no longer care if we honor our parents, but instead think our parents ought to honor us?
Could it be because our society use to be based on the Judeo/Christian scriptures; but that society is now adrift? It does seem that certain elements of our society have pushed Americans to base all their lives on self-centered, greedy, lusts. Caring for others, especially our parents, doesn’t fit in with this new baseless immorality.
When one reads the Bible it becomes quite clear that God seems to think it is a very important for us to honor our parents. I don’t know how a person could call themselves a Christian, and dishonor their parents!
First of all, it is one of the top ten commandments…as a matter of fact, it is number 5 and is followed by “Thou shalt not kill”.
God is serious about it! He frankly tells us that we will not live a good long life, if we dishonor our parents!
Exodus 20:12
“ Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you.”
Exodus 21:15
“And he who strikes his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.”
Exodus 21:17
“And he who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.”
Seems that the Bible says that one definition of “dishonoring” parents, is to treat their parents with “contempt” or insult them . God says that such a person is cursed. Publicly rejecting, and insulting ones parents, is certainly contemptible! Returning their gifts, because you didn’t really think the gifts measured up to your standards; publicly saying that they were not smart enough to know how to help you, when it is more appropriate to say that you do not know how to gracefully accept their help; or being critical of the way they managed their home; and omitting them from your life and the life of their grandchildren; ignoring them, is treating them with contempt! It is insulting! God says you are cursed if you do these things! Argue with God about it. Not me. He is the one who said it.
Leviticus 20:9
‘For everyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him.”
Deuteronomy 27:16
‘Cursed is the one who treats his father or his mother with contempt.’ “And all the people shall say, ‘Amen!’
Ephesians 6:1-2
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
Colossians 3:20
Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.
The Bible says that children who disobey their parents….and the Bible never mentions a cut off age for this obedience; that these children are evil and should be killed!
Deuteronomy 21:18-21
[ The Rebellious Son ] “If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother, and who, when they have chastened him, will not heed them, then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his city, to the gate of his city. And they shall say to the elders of his city, ‘This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious; he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard.’ Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death with stones; so you shall put away the evil from among you, and all Israel shall hear and fear.”
Wow! That seems pretty harsh, doesn’t it?! Guess God is pretty serious about this particular behavior. He wants us to honor our parents, and obey them. That is clear.
But, okay. What do we do if we have abusive parents, or parents that command us to do immoral, ungodly things? OR, if they do immoral ungodly things to us?
In that case, the fact is, it would bring honor to your parents, in that case, to disobey them! For they are dishonoring themselves, and you should not join them. Anger and abuse is clearly a sin in the Bible. Do not support them in sin, by allowing them to abuse you! Discipline, even spanking on the bottom, is NOT a sin. But the Bible clearly states that Fathers should not exasperate their children. (Colossians 3:21 and Ephesians 6:4) And slapping the face, pulling hair, yelling, jerking arms, pinching…binding, starving, isolating, are very disheartening and exasperating to children. Children are in training, they are not to be the avenue for adult venting! That is abuse.
But, adults are another matter. There is no more discipline to be done. Anger is a sin, and you must not encourage it in your parents. Lying is a sin. Do not participate in it, by ignoring the lies they say directed at you or your family. Telling the truth is honorable. It is not gossip. Do not participate in any abuse directed at you or your family! Yet, do not strike back…do not yell back; let them answer to God. You must do the honorable thing. And that could mean stopping them from hurting others, by exposing their abuse; or calling the authorities; or it may mean simply walking away, and staying away from them, so that they are not tempted to abuse, and thus dishonor themselves.
A moral, upright child brings much honor to their parents. When people see outstanding people, they often think that the person must have been raised by outstanding people. So, getting away from the abuse, and becoming a good person, is VERY honoring to your parents!
Jesus said as much, when he said,
Matthew 10:37
“He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me….”
Numbers 6:7
“He shall not make himself unclean even for his father or his mother,…….”
Say it AGAIN:“HE SHALL NOT MAKE HIMSELF UNCLEAN EVEN FOR HIS FATHER OR HIS MOTHER…..”
If your parents ask you to do anything illegal: use drugs, hide or lie about their use of drugs, manufacture or sell or deliver drugs, steal, cover up their illegal actions, murder; or anything ungodly, such as lie and gossip, participate in sexual sin, or worshiping another god, or encouraging you to break your Sabbath day, or dishonor God in some manner; if they encourage you to be unloving to your neighbors, and others…or if they attempt to divide and destroy your marriage, by slandering your spouse to you and to others…. Remember that the Bible says a man:
“SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND HIS MOTHER AND CLEAVE TO HIS WIFE” (Mark 10:7)
— if your parents want you to do any type of breaking of God’s laws…it is your DUTY as a good child, to NOT obey their wishes! You must not dishonor them by participating in their sin!
But, if your parents are merely irritating to you, or they embarrass you, you think their ideas are silly, they are complainers, negative and demanding, if they are boring….. there is no excuse. You must learn to deal with them. You must take care of them, visit them, and bless them as your Parents. It is your duty in Christ Jesus. For Jesus said:
“But you say it is all right for people to say to their parents, ‘Sorry, I can’t help you. For I have vowed to give to God what I would have given to you.’ In this way, you say they don’t need to honor their parents. And so you cancel the word of God for the sake of your own tradition. You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you, for he wrote, ‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship is a farce, for they teach man-made ideas as commands from God.” Matt.15:5-9
Lastly, let me just say, that if I didn’t already believe in the Bible, everyday as I read the news, and see things like the increase in disrespect for parents; I should pause and have to consider that the Bible is true, for thousands of years ago, it was predicted that this very thing would happen, in the “end days”.
” But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!”—2Timothy3:1-5 NKJV
Lindahoyt's Blog 